It’s Fathers Day in the United States. A time honored tradition of recognizing the dads in our lives with ties, golf shirts, bbq’s, and unfunny greeting cards.
This year, we’re trading tee times for doctors appointments and digging into life as a male family caregiver. Got a husband, brother, or dad who’s stepping up when it’s most needed? Pass this email along and let ‘em know we see them too. We’re way more humorous than anything Hallmark could write.
ICYMI (in case you missed it)
🇬🇧 King Charles III marked his official birthday (June 14) with the annual Trooping the Colour, returning via carriage as he continues cancer treatment. The ceremony served as a powerful reminder: cancer has a global reach and impact.
🎵 This week, we said goodbye to Brian Wilson, the legendary Beach Boys co-founder whose music changed the world. But beyond the hits and the harmonies, Brian’s later years were marked by a battle many caregivers know all too well: dementia. Brian’s struggle with dementia brought new awareness to the challenges faced by millions and the caregivers who walk that path with them.
🩺 At Yale New Haven Hospital, Ralston Sessions II and his son, Ralston Sessions III, are building a family legacy of compassionate care. Sessions II started his career 20 years ago, and his son followed in his footsteps, showing how caregiving runs deep in families.
🥳 Organizations like Family Caregivers Online are shining a light on what caregivers can do to help celebrate elderly fathers on their special day.
Let’s Hear It For The Boys
Close your eyes and imagine a caregiver. Think of a woman? That picture isn’t inaccurate, it’s just incomplete. Today, nearly 40 percent of America’s 53 million unpaid family caregivers are men. That’s roughly 21 million sons, brothers, husbands and grandkids showing up daily for their loved ones. These numbers are growing, quietly and often in the shadows of outdated assumptions. For many men, caregiving arrives like a plot twist. One minute, you’re learning to shave; the next, you’re trimming Dad’s beard and sorting his prescriptions.
In a space where people rarely ask for support, male caregivers are less likely to talk about burnout, ask for help, or feel seen in caregiving spaces that have long centered on women. But they’re in the thick of it just the same. Some are still working full-time. Many are also raising children. All are navigating a role they weren’t necessarily prepared for.
🛠 What men are facing
💔 Emotionally Speaking, It’s A Lot
No manual, no map. Most guys didn’t grow up watching men care, so when caregiving shows up, it hits like a pop quiz you didn’t study for.
Shame storm. Many men feel like they should know what they’re doing. Cooking, bathing, managing meds? Cue the self-doubt spiral.
Sons carry big emotional weight. Studies show sons report some of the highest levels of stress — especially when caring for parents.
Nobody talks about it. Male caregivers are less likely to open up, which means the isolation hits different. You’re burned out but still showing up because… who else will?
🩹 Physically? It’ll Wear You Down
The body keeps the score. Most male caregivers aren’t getting enough sleep, skipping their own doctor visits, and pushing through chronic fatigue like it’s a badge of honor.
Stress is sneaky. Headaches, high blood pressure, gut issues? They don’t scream “caregiving,” but they often come with the job.
Burnout doesn’t care if you’re strong. Even the guys who “don’t get emotional” are running on fumes.
💸 And Then There’s The Money
Work gets sidelined. Many male caregivers cut hours or leave jobs entirely. They also often pick up the tab for outsourced caregiving support. That all comes with obvious (and not-so-obvious) financial fallout.
Nobody’s training you. Most men enter caregiving without resources, guidance, or support. It’s a crash course in chaos.
Support feels… not made for you. The spaces for help often feel pink-washed, emotionally performative, or just plain awkward.
🌪 The Ripple Effect No One Prepares You For
Marriage gets tense. Spouses may feel neglected, resentful, or flat-out confused by the emotional absence caregiving can create.
Kids feel the shift. When Dad’s wrapped up in Grandpa’s care, bedtime stories and soccer practice sometimes take a backseat. Kids notice, even if they don’t say it out loud.
Sibling strain is real. When one brother steps up and the others step back, resentment brews fast. Add in old family baggage and unspoken expectations? Fireworks.
Sandwich generation squeeze. If you’re caring for a parent while also raising children, you're basically managing a multigenerational pressure cooker. And there’s no escape hatch.
🆘 Where To Get Backup
Jack’s Caregiver Coalition: Helpful made for guys resources and playbooks for men who don’t read instruction manuals.
Men’s Group: Virtual rooms just for men, led by men, tackling caregiving clashes, burnout, and guilt.
Caregiver Action Network (CAN): Nationwide peer support, resources, webinars and a 24/7 help desk.
The caregiving story is shifting, and men are in it, front and center, whether anyone expected them to be or not. And while applause isn't necessary, support is.
