You’re sitting at the doctor’s office with mom, nodding along while they say “dementia” and “Alzheimer’s” like they’re interchangeable. You don’t want to interrupt, but also - what’s the difference? Are they the same? Is one worse? Should you be Googling this at red lights again?
You’re not alone. A lot of people don’t know the difference, and guess what? That’s totally normal. The words get tossed around like synonyms, but they’re not. And if you’re caring for someone experiencing memory loss, confusion, or major mood swings, it helps to know what you’re actually dealing with.
Let’s break it down - no jargon, no judgment, just the facts (and maybe a gentle laugh or two).
ICYMI (in case you missed it)
🏅There’s a new Golden Bachelor in town. Mel Owens is single and ready to mingle according to ABC.
🧠Your brain on technology - studies show it could be a good thing.
🪦The Stanford Letter Project turns 10 this year. Founded by Dr. Periyakoil, Professor of Medicine; Associate Dean of Research (Geriatrics and Palliative Care), the effort encourages end-of-life discussions and provides templates to help.
👩❤️👨Living with dementia, Mavis Leno’s husband, comedian Jay Leno, candidly shared his experience as her primary caregiver.
Dementia vs. Alzheimer's
Your plate is plenty full. Work, kids, relationships, life - it’s a lot. And now you’re noticing some changes in Mom and Dad that you can’t just chalk up to “senior moments.” It’s scary. It’s confusing. It’s definitely not a good time. You want to know if your eldest daughter energy is stuck in overdrive or if there's a medical issue that needs attention. Before starting your internet deep dive, know this: Dementia and Alzheimer’s are not the same thing.
Here’s the quick breakdown:
Before we get too deep, quick vocab check: dementia is the umbrella term for symptoms like memory loss, confusion, and trouble with thinking. Alzheimer’s disease is just one type of dementia - the most common, but not the only type.
Signs and Symptoms to Look For:
When should your spidey senses really start tingling? Pay attention if you notice:
Memory loss that disrupts daily life (forgetting recently learned information, asking the same questions over and over)
Confusion with time or place (getting lost in a familiar neighborhood)
Difficulty completing familiar tasks (like balancing a checkbook or following a favorite recipe)
Problems with words - stumbling mid-sentence, calling everyday objects the wrong name
Poor judgment (giving money away to scam callers, wearing a winter coat in July)
Withdrawal from social activities, hobbies, or family gatherings
Mood and personality changes - increased suspicion, fearfulness, depression, or anxiety
How the Diagnosis Happens:
No single magic test says “Yep, it’s Alzheimer’s!” Diagnosing dementia (and pinpointing the type) usually means:
A thorough medical history (and yes, your input about Mom or Dad’s behavior is critical - they’ll really love this part)
Cognitive and neuropsychological testing (memory, problem-solving, language skills)
Blood tests to rule out things like vitamin deficiencies or thyroid issues
Brain imaging (CT, MRI, or PET scans) to spot changes in brain structure
Sometimes, a specialist like a neurologist, geriatrician (we fangirl hard for Dr. Ellie), or psychiatrist will get looped in. And yeah, it can feel a little like you’re suddenly in a medical episode of CSI. That’s normal. This kind of diagnosis is more puzzle than pop quiz. But here’s the thing: getting the right eyes on this early? That’s putting the right pieces in place. It sets you up to actually do something, not just worry on repeat.
Bottom line:
Catching the signs early gives you - and your parents - the best shot at getting help, planning ahead, and making the most out of the years to come. You don’t have to have all the answers yet. Support and education are available. Advantages in age-tech are coming, and we’re optimistic they’ll help improve both your parents quality of life and yours as you care for them.
🤝Need backup? Here’s where to start:
Alzheimer’s Association
24/7 helpline, local groups, and solid advice.
alz.org
Family Caregiver Alliance
Support, webinars, and one-on-one help for caregivers.
caregiver.org
Dementia Society of America
Clear info on all types of dementia, not just Alzheimer’s.
dementiasociety.org
National Institute on Aging (NIA)
Trusted, science-backed info on dementia and caregiving.
nia.nih.gov
Hilarity for Charity (HFC)
Free respite care grants + a whole lot of heart.
wearehfc.org
Aging Life Care Association
Need a pro to help you quarterback this thing? Start here.
aginglifecare.org
Show and Tell
Show and Tell is where we feature the art, writing, and brilliance wrung from the chaos of caring for aging parents. Made something funny, raw, or weirdly profound at 2 a.m. between meds and Medicare calls? We want to see it. Bonus points if it’s held together with tape and hope.
Big love to reader Jamie DeAngelo, who made this piece while showing up every day for her 86-year-old dad. She even worked in the Gray Monster colors - flattery will get you everywhere, Jamie.
Art By: Jamie DeAngelo
